Turgid vs Tumescent

turgidSome of us may have encountered these words in various places during our literary explorations. The younger folks have probably come across it in bad fan fiction.  Most of us know what they mean, or at least what they’re intended to mean in context. Let’s explore them.

tu·mes·cent t(y)o͞oˈmes(ə)nt/ adjective
  1. swollen or becoming swollen, especially as a response to sexual arousal.
  2. (especially of language or literary style) pompous or pretentious; tumid.
    “his prose is tumescent, full of orotund language”
tur·gid ˈtərjəd/ adjective
1. swollen and distended or congested.
      “a turgid and fast-moving river”
2.  (of language or style) tediously pompous or bombastic.
      “some turgid verses on the death of Prince Albert”
In context, despite the dictionary definitions, turgid comes across (to me) as more insistent. While tumescent is a condition, turgid is demanding something be done about it.
Interestingly, both of these words, in addition to the referenced “tumid,” which I don’t remember seeing before, have a latin origin, from different roots (tumescere, turgere and tumere, respectively).
all beginning with “tu.”
“Tu” is latin for “you” or “yourself.” Go figure.

Healthy Snack Choices

We have a well-stocked pantry at my office. At any time I can choose between literally dozens of choices. Today I was trying to decide between junk food and maybe something a little bit healthier. I picked up two items that couldn’t be farther apart. Or so I thought.

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Evil crack Doritos vs sweet bunny rabbit Garden Veggie Straws. Easy choice, right? Clearly the Doritos taste so much better than the Veggie Straws that the Veggie Straws MUST be much healthier, right? RIGHT?

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The joys of being a homeowner

This week has been a challenge. Our upstairs air conditioner has been down for several months — the compressor is shot, and that’s an expensive repair or replacement. As in several thousand.  On Sunday, the downstairs unit stopped cooling. We were worried that it would have a similar or equally expensive disability. I spent a few hours on Sunday in the heat playing amateur HVAC technician, and was pretty confident that it wasn’t the compressor. I thought it was either the contactor or one of the fuses in the outdoor disconnect. Monday a tech came out and confirmed my diagnosis. What a relief. Replacing a contactor is a hell of a lot cheaper than the other possibilities.

Then later in the week, the disposal became the focus of our efforts. It has had a minor leak for a while, I thought it was the drain pipes, and had tried a couple of times to adjust them. Finally the leak became much worse, and last night when I got home I started the diagnostic process on that. Turns out the leak wasn’t in the PVC drain pipe at all — the unit itself had developed a leak, I guess it rusted out over the years. I ordered a new unit today, replacing our 1/3 hp Kenmore with a 3/4hp Insinkerator Badger 900. Eve picked it up this afternoon, and I set out to perform the replacement when I got home. Didn’t take as long as I thought it would, and voila, no leaks. I do like it when stuff works.

I sometimes reminisce fondly about the good old days when I was renting an apartment and could just call the landlord anytime something went wrong.

BUSY BUSY BUSY

National Masturbation Day

From http://www.flashnews.com/news/wfn1050523J7930.html way back in 2005 — by extrapolation, that means that tomorrow is the TWENTIETH anniversary of the noble and esteemed holiday. I hope everyone celebrates it to the best of their abilities.  (According to the Great Oracle Of Ginormous Learning Experiences, the holiday was celebrated on May 7 until 2001, and in 2005 May 28 was set as the “Day”).

Monday, May 23, 2005


National Masturbation Month Reaches Climax On May 28

SAN FRANCISCO (Wireless Flash – FlashNews) – May has been declared “National Masturbation Month” by the Good Vibrations sex toy company.

But the annual event really reaches a climax on May 28, which is National Masturbation Day.

That’s when touchy-feely people all across America will be coming together for a good cause called the “Masturbate- A-Thon,” where they ask for pledges based on the length of time they pleasure themselves.

This year marks the 10th anniversary of National Masturbation Month and while most people will “celebrate” in private, organizer and sex expert Dr. Carol Queen expects at least 100 self-proclaimed self-lovers will gather in San Francisco for a hands-on charity event benefitting the Center for Sex and Culture.

Participants will have to provide their own toys, but Queen says there will be plenty of “lube and latex” for those who need them as well as a special “voyeur’s room” for the media.

Because it is a public event, participants shouldn’t ask others for “assistance” but Queen says it is permissible to ask for “support” or “inspiration.”

putting more of myself out there